I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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