I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
