FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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