her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
