So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
