if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
grandma shit on top of the toilet
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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