Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
