I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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