Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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