Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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