Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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