Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
