Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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