Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
