Ambien. No doubt about it.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
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