There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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