are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize