But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....