And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
