I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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