are you still at the devil's house?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize