Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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