You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
They are going to name an STD after you.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize