I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize