an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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