i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
