You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
