she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize