he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Randomize
