The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
