what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
