i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Your cock deserves a montage
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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