whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
