But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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