worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
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After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
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Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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