Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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