I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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