:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
how drunk are you?
Several
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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