I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Do vagina's smell?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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