She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
