Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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