She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
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