Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
