We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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