Im at strip club and am horny
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
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