i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
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