As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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