First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
