Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
