Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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