note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
