Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Randomize
